Oh, why did I do grad school? I sometimes wonder what someone slipped into my drink to make me take all this on. I don't know what I was thinking, but I know I'm not thinking it now.
Friday I take a comprehensive final that encompasses all that I've learned the past two years. No big deal. By February 15, I have to have 10 interviews transcribed, coded and added to a first draft submission of my thesis. No pressure.
I have to wait about two more months before I find out if I am going to school for another three, so I can get a PhD. My life is in limbo.
I REALLY want to graduate in April and I if I don't, then I feel like I am a failure. I also want to get accepted into graduate school and get a sweet teaching offer along with it.
I also feel like the inversion is making me sicker and sicker. My house looks like a bomb in it and I put on seven pounds in the past two weeks.
But, on a more positive not, I did score an amazing digital piano for a pittance. I will be able to start composing more. I want to get some music transposing software. There are other great things happening in life too.
We went to Maryland for Christmas, my mother came out to take Emily to school and visit me. We are most likely going to be able to go home this summer and we'll be able to see John and Amber's new baby. There are still great things happening in life but its hard to enjoy those when there is so much to fear. The end.
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