Swimming, I’m a professional. I move so fast that the water doesn’t even ripple. I’m like a diving duck, a penguin, a dolphin…a whale. But really I’m embarrassed to say that I think the life guard laughs at me whenever my head is dunked under the water and I can’t hear him. I swear I must not have a prideful bone in my body because I go to the pool and swim. Let me rephrase that, I go to the pool, struggle to stay afloat and I do all of this in public, surrounded by people my age, including men.
How am I sacrificing my pride? First off, I am sticking on a swim suit. That takes the pride factor and throws in on the ground. Because me in a swim suit is ridiculous. Wearing swim trunks helps my situation a little embarrassing. You’re just lucky that I didn’t buy the Batman one’s I saw in Walmart yesterday. That would’ve been embarrassing for everyone. Maybe I will even blame the trunks for the reason why I am so slow to make it from one side of the pool to the next
That brings up the next contributing factor as to why I am not a prideful person.
The actual swimming part is where it gets sad. Not only am I putting a swim suit on but I am also swimming in that swim suit. I don’t go to the pool to do hand stands or float on my back or check out the abs on guys—but sometimes I do look…
I go there for a real work out. Sadly I don’t look like much when I am “swimming” laps in the pool. It looks like a shark has got me by the leg and is slowly dragging me down to the bottom of the pool. I can’t swim. I won’t even try and lie and say that I can. I simply try to stay afloat. I consider that exercise. When I do a lap, it’s like a turtle trying to make it across the street.
The most embarrassing part is the bystanders or what we like to call “lifeguards.” I swear, when the life guard sees me get into the pool he probably tightens his grip on the lifesaver float. I’m sure it’s a fun story to bring home to his roommates. “Every time I go to the pool now, I think I may be saving a life today. I see this ridiculous girl in trunks at the pool and each time I see her it seems that she struggles more and more to keep afloat.”
And of course, as I am doing my version of swimming--which is the doggie paddle--I begin to wonder why I am there.
Its’ when I start my day feeling brand new, with my abs feeling tight and knowing that no one will recognize me—hopefully-- as the girl who can barely make it from one side of the pool to the other that I am glad that I dropped my pride and went to the pool.
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