Because of this I am beautiful

"Shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake . . . shake your booty." Did I just quote this song? Why yes, I did. I have a booty to shake. Actually, I have quite the booty to shake.

I now begin to realize that the horrific monster that wondered the halls of high school and sought refuge in work at the office during college is no longer a monster. The monster is not a monster but a woman, an attractive woman at that.

I'm still startled when a seemingly attractive or even seemingly unattractive man says that I'm beautiful (I can be no judge, we all have our unique brand of "hot" "sexy" "beautiful" that we apply to the members of the opposite gender).

Bear in mind, I'm not talking about my Grandma anymore or the old guys in church; I used to get compliments from them all the time, back in the "ugly days". They were probably hallucinating from their meds or in my grandma's case, not wearing their glasses.

But now, men with good vision tell me I'm beautiful and I don't know what to think. I used to always think it was a ploy, an easy way to get in an average girl's pants. But now, now I don't know what to think.

I know we are all beautiful children of God, but I always thought I was the exception. I was the ugly duckling that would always be ugly. Something happened a long the way. I'm not ugly.

I still look in the mirror, I still see this chubby wannabe but at the same time I realize that I have a lot to offer.

But its more than just a butt, a chest, a waste-line, a decent wardrobe; I've developed a mind, an air of confidence. I'm a woman on a mission, no longer a girl with no ambition.

While I am still kind, while I still listen, I feel no shame in sharing my opinions, I feel no shame in sharing who I am really am. I hide behind no mask; I act how I want. I think this makes me beautiful, makes me desirable.

Really, I could only change so much physically. I think the true beauty is that I've become who I have wanted to be. While the refining process will never be finished, I still like who I am aspiring to be and because of this I am beautiful.